Lately, I have been running around trying to find the magic remedy to this thing called life. I have been trying to find balance. As I am analyzing my actions, I noticed that a huge part to me not being as productive as I liked was due to my emotional wellness. I was still suffering from a lot from childhood. I was angry at people who have not done anything to me recently. But their words, actions and the way they made me feel began to hunt me. I was re-experiencing pain from my past. There was surely resentment, a lot of it.
The most interesting thing is that I was thinking that I am on this level up vibe and improving my overall health so things would be on the upside, right??? Wrong. The process of self-awareness and growth requires you to look yourself in the mirror and dissect those areas of improvement down until you heal. That is the hardest part, indeed. It is like understanding you have this issue but being so afraid to go through it because you foresee the process. It feels like you are re-experiencing the pain but in all actuality you are overcoming the pain and healing.
One thing I had to realize was my growth depends on me. It is ignited by me and without me there is no growth. Growing requires you to come from one stage and evolve to the next. So, that means for you to grow, you have to let the stage you are in go. Yes, you have to learn to move with time and keep going. You cant have heavy weight holding you down as you grow. It will only hinder the process. The hugest part of letting go is forgiving yourself. Forgive yourself for the situation. As much as you want to blame yourself, don't; that very situation happened because it was apart of your story. It happened, it was and it is what it is. Do what you have to do to let it go, but actually let it go.
3 Ways to Help Let "Pain" Go:
#1 Journal It Out- Write until you get all of it out. Writing it out will help you process the situation and feel better about what happened. It will bring clarity.
#2 Go See a Therapist- Talking to someone will definitely help so much. Going to therapy will definitely help you with processing the situation. Sometimes you may need to just hear yourself talk it out so you can make better of the situation that happened.
#3 Pray- Prayer changes things. When you cast your cares unto the Lord it surely lifts a weight off of your shoulder. You feel free. Talk to God about what happened and maybe you can receive peace from what you don't know and understand the situation better.
This was truly on my heart because so many people are hurt and afraid to grow just because of the pain they carry each day. I just want to encourage anyone who needs to hear this, that YOU ARE A LIVING TESTIMONY OF AN OVER COMER, A STRONG WARRIOR AND A WINNER. It takes a lot to forgive, forget and grow from a painful situation so clap yourself on the back for even attempting to face the lemons of life in the face. You are definitely resilient and that my Queen is power by itself.
Stay encouraged on your journey through life. Remember that the extra weight NEEDS to go because where you are growing the weight would only slow down the process. Forgive them, forgive yourself, and leave it with God. That's all.
I love you ladies,
Toni
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